Firstly, can we please have a moments silence for Tony
I’ve been reading a few articles on Tony Greig in the last few
weeks and the thing that stands out is that he taught people not to be afraid of
having an opinion on the game of cricket. I have thought about this and I think
he is right.
On Friday my opinion on cricket is very positive, Kaipaki are
fielding 3 teams, people are starting to pay for their whites and I’ve had 4
pints of beer with David Kneebone, Martin Bradley, Graeme Currie and Darin
Armstrong in which we have plotted a Kaipaki tour to Melbourne late this year
that will coincide with the Boxing Day Ashes test – actually cricket is the
greatest game in the world right now.
Saturday morning comes around and the sun is out, cricket is a
great game. Jump in the minivan pick up the ‘Green’ bit of the Kaipaki team and
have an enjoyable trip listening to the Y generation of the Kaipaki Nation about
their New Years antics and shenanigans. Get to Matamata, although the pitch
looks good the outfield is long and the grass looks thick…the game of cricket
isn’t as enjoyable as it was 5 minutes ago. We get into the changing room – as
Zoolander said in the 2002 movie ‘Zoolander’ “What is this, a building for ants?
This building needs to be 3 times bigger than this”. I’m 34 and sharing a
changing room that is big as Howard Bakers Ego (actually bad description, that
is massive), that is tiny, with a bunch of 18 year olds makes me feel very
uncomfortable and my opinion of cricket has again dropped a little. Big speech
about the famous Baggy Green and Gold Cap…feel really good again and cricket is
again the best sport in the world. I go and present the caps…Sh%t!! I have left
them in the dryer at my house in Hamilton. The game of cricket is stupid and at
34 I should be doing something far more sophisticated.
The players in the ‘Green’ bit of the Kaipaki team have had many
battles in the last 5 years. They have negotiated pubity, had their first
relationship (I would say with a girl, but after looking at their hairstyles
and what they wear and talk about, I could be wrong), they have had to plan and
plot way’s to go to parties etc without their parents finding out, they’ve had
to listen to ridiculous music…they’ve encountered a lot and won many battles.
Playing the first round of the champions league against the defending champions
was a step too far for the players in the ‘Green’ bit however. We got beaten
badly – bowled out for 108 and lost by 10 wickets…The game of cricket is one of
the worst games in the world - It’s 30 degrees, there’s no shade, I’m sweating
like Abo’s at a spelling bee and my chafe has gone to a whole new level in
which my gait has become as wide as Nick Groves
I get a text from Darin Armstrong who is the Manager of the‘Gold’
bit of the team. They have scored 250…cricket is again looking reasonably good.
I get another text from Darin which says Howard baker got 52. Cricket again
looking not so good.
Because the ‘Green’ bits game only lasted 45 minutes, we decided
to get something out of our trip to Matamata, we went to Hobbiton…while I was
there I also picked up some recruits.
I head to Steele Park to watch the ‘Gold’ bits game. Nick Groves
is bowling…The Kaipaki team is built on humour and Nick’s bowling has taken the
humour to a whole new level. Cricket again a good game. There will be a match
report on the game by Darin Armstrong so I don’t want to ruin it by writing
about the match details….I did leave Steele Park though with the opinion that
cricket is a good game again.
Sunday, The combination of the Green and Gold bits played a
friendly fixture against Melville. It was a wonderful day and everyone had a
very enjoyable day on Kaipaki Oval. Graeme Kennedy was outstanding – he became
the first batsman in the history of the game to be run out in one innings of a
game of cricket. Very funny indeed and my opinion on cricket has certainly
It’s now Monday, my Chafe has gone, my back feels good, people
are living the Kaipaki Dream and we can’t wait for Saturday as we will do it all
over again…My opinion on cricket Mr Greig, is that it is the greatest game on
Yours in loving being an 18 year old again and listening to music
that doesn’t have words and asking for money off my parents,